And He's off to Serve the Lord

Christmas break was like no other I have ever experienced.  I did most of the Christmas shopping while Alan was in Utah picking up Josh from BYU.  Which meant all of his things had to come home with him.  I won't lie, that first day he was home, I cried and cried.  I guess I knew it was the beginning of the end of our family life as we knew it.  Nothing would ever be like it was.  It would be different.  It hit me like a ton of bricks and I was done for.  I cried through church, I cried when we got home.  I cried all day.  I was a mess.  My eyes ended up being the size of a mini marshmellow.  I finally settled down and decided that I would not loose it again!

We totally enjoyed Christmas. Being all together and sharing in the joy that the season brings.  Immediately after Christmas, we started shopping for Josh to get him ready for his mission.  The Sunday after Christmas, he talked in church.  The next afternoon, Seth received his Eagle certificate in the mail and because Seth really wanted Josh there to present him with his Eagle, we threw together an Eagle Court of Honor for the following Sunday. (Josh's last Sunday here.)  I can't tell you how much stress that put me under.  I thought I would loose it, but I held it all in.  Even when Seth turned around and gave Josh a mentor pin!

Here are my men!  So proud that I have two Eagle Scouts!

We prayed so hard for Josh to get his Visa but it did not come.  I got a call from President Salmon, our Stake President, informing me that Josh would be going to Provo Missionary Training Center.  He was sad about that, and understandably because he had his heart set on going to the training center in Madrid, Spain.  He will still get there, just not before he is trained at Provo.

On Tuesday the 7th of January 2014 he was set apart to serve as a missionary to the people of Spain.  What a wonderful experience that was.  I particularly loved hearing the thoughts and feelings of everyone in the room, including my husband and my children. But it was something else when Josh got to share his feelings and testimony of what he is about to go do for two years.  As he shared his thoughts, all doubt of him being ready vanished from my heart.  He is ready and he will be a great missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The next morning we all got up early and took him to the airport.  It is surreal to a parent to think of sending your child off not being able to touch him, call him (only at Christmas and Mothers day) or see him for 2 years.  And knowing that you are sending him off to experience one of the hardest, tiring, rewarding experiences of his life; one he will treasure and cherish the rest of his days.  He will be so far away and in a culture he knows nothing about and a language he will barely speak for the first little bit, but many before and many after will be doing exactly that.

We watched his plane leave and came home to the driveway covered in chalk with this on it.  If you can'd read it it says, "Elder Josh Hamberlin is off to serve in Spain (Espana)! with a big drawing of an Elder with scriptures in his hand.    

And the lawn filled with hearts and sayings.

Here is the Elder and the Scriptures. 

And hearts made out of rocks! 

 There were also two boquets of flowers and a bag with items in it for me (mom).  

What a blessing to have such thoughtful people in my life.  I had many text me and send me messages on facebook to let me know they were thinking of me.  I ended up being emotionally and physically drained and took a two hour nap after lunch.  All in all, I am grateful to have those two and a half weeks behind me.  I am sad that he is gone, but so grateful that he is where he is at.  Alan commented the other day that Josh should be in class at that time.  Then he said he wished that they could write us more often so that we might know how he is feeling and doing.  I agree.  But until then we will wait for those Preparation days when he can write to us and tell us what he is experiencing.  I have thought a lot about my own experiences when I was a missionary and the wonderful memories and experiences I had.  I would not trade them for the world.  I hope he feels the same.

Missing Mom

My mother always had some funny sayings when I was growing up.  She had some fun ideas about what it was like in Heaven before we came to earth.  She also had some great ideas about what the next life would be like as well.  I guess in some ways I like to think about some of her thoughts about those far off places that can't be touched at present.  I want to share a few of those thoughts with you.

1: There are lines in Heaven where we are given specific talents and gifts.  My mother was an avid reader and a very decent writer, as was her mother before her.  Both of them were published authors of poetry and articles.  I did not stand in "that line" when talents were being handed out.  Although I love to read, I have often wished I had a way with words to be able to paint a picture, or describe a scene.  Maybe I should take more time to practice by writing on this blog, eh?  There are many more "lines" I wish I would have stood in to get those "talents or gifts" but that shall be a blog on another day.

2: When we get to Heaven again, and are crowned with Glory, we shall be able to make our own worlds.  She claims that there is a Grass Making class 101 and Butterflies and Other Flashy Insects class.  She thought we might learn the basics for making worlds.  She would see something beautiful and say, "Heavenly Father must have had fun making that, don't you think?"  I think he did.  

I miss her daily although it has been nearly 12 years since she left this earth.  I find myself wanting to share some exciting news with her, or give her a call to unload my pain or sorrow.  I want to ask her questions that only she can answer about things in my younger years or things that she went through.  I want to ask her how she was able to let me go after high school when I am saying goodbye to one of my kids as they leave.  Did it tear her heart out as much as it is tearing out mine?  I find myself wishing that I could shoot her a text or an email and get a response.  

I wonder what she is doing "up there" and what committees she must be on.  She used to say that her sister, who died in 1982-83 would be on the welcoming committee.  I do believe that, but what is mom up to?  Who has she recently seen or visited with or accomplished.  I know that I will see her once again, but I long to hear her voice, and hear her laugh, and feel her hugs.  Miss you mom!

 

Moving On - Times 2

I don't even know how to begin this post.  I am trying to be careful what I say or think because if I think about it too much I cry.  But I need to "put it down" so there is proof someday that I really did "feel" about it all.

First off is graduation for Josh.  May 24, 2012

I have another graduate.  I am amazed how hard this has been for me to know that I have two that have graduated high school.  It just seems like I was just graduating and wondering what I was going to do with my life.  Trying to decide where I was going to go to school, what I would major in, how soon I would find that special someone to be happy with.  And now, I have Two children at that stage of life!  Two out of high school, Two in college, Two moving on and Two moving out!

We were all there to support Josh but Seth disappeared quickly after the ceremonies.

The day after graduation, as a family, we moved Tessa into her apartment.  That seemed even more difficult to handle than Josh graduating the night before!  My oldest, my first, my own baby girl leaving the nest, becoming independent, cutting her strings, flying the coop, being on her own.  I couldn't watch as tears filled both of our eyes as we left her at her doorstep.  I wish I would have taken a photo of that, but I couldn't see and I didn't want to upset her.  I cried all night and found out later she did too. Her apartment is too quiet and lonely when her roommate is not there, so we see her on the weekends.  I can handle that.  But once Soccer season starts we won't see her as much.

In August, Josh will start college in Utah.  Even farther away than Tessa.  I am sure it will hurt as much to drive away after we drop him off as well.  Oh the adventures he will have being away from his parents.  I am sure he will do well.  I realize they are old enough to go to college and be on their own, but they are mine, and we as mothers, spend our whole parenting years doing just that.  It is not so easy to turn "off" those mothering feelings that have been maturing for the 18 years they have been "on".  How do you, when there is no switch?

So now I will be down two kiddos at home.  I am curious to see how the dynamics of the family will change.

Indexing

I received a new church calling in January. The Stake Family History Director and Indexing Director. A stake is comprised of usually 10 wards. A ward is a specific area with about 500 or so members. That being said, I have a specific time that I am at the Stake Center in a room to help anyone with their family history or indexing. Thursday evenings. It is very rewarding to have people come and to link those of their ancestors to their family trees.

Lately though, I have found joy in indexing. Indexing is where a person has scanned or taken a photo of a document (i.e., birth or death certificate, marriage license, draft card, voting records, ships logs or census records) and made it available for those willing, to read those images and type the information on to the computer. These are then made available to those searching over the internet for lost loved ones. Two people index the same image and if there are any differences, it is sent to an arbitrator that makes the final decision before it is released into cyber space. It's all fascinating! By doing this I provide others a way to find the information they might be looking for.

The first of April, the 1940 USA Census was released. In the first week 17,000,000 names were indexed. There are over 132,000,000 that need to be indexed with in 6 months. I am grateful to be part of such a great thing. If any of you would like to index you can go to www.familysearch.org and get started. There is a tutorial you can watch. You won't be sorry you did.

Family Photos 2012

Spring break this week and a chance to do something as a family before we all went our separate ways. I thought we would throw together some family photos. We had them scheduled to take them the week that my Dad died hence they did not happen. So literally, I went shopping on Monday morning with some of the kids. (We decided on Sunday evening to do them Monday night). I loved what we picked out! I love the brighter colors when put up next to the bright green of the lawns this time of year!

Our impromptu photographer, Val, was funny and kept us in stitches! Thanks Val! There was a lot of goofy-ness going on and a lot of smiles and laughter. I was grateful. There are so many of these photos that I love! And I am looking forward to hanging them on my wall. I am getting a big one done in canvas! I can't wait!


I love this smile on Megan! It is totally her!


Josh showing off his buffness!







I love Tessa's eye in this one.

First to Fly!

Josh had his Eagle Court of Honor last Sunday evening. It was an awesome court of honor. On Saturday I had him get in full uniform so I could get an official photo for the display at the court of honor. This is one of my favorites.



All Eagle scouts are given a pin for each of their parents. This is the photo of Josh pinning the mom pin on my sash that holds all of the pins he has ever gotten. I think the look I am giving him tells how I feel about that moment.



After he is awarded his award, he then has a moment to give a mentor pin or pins to those who helped inspire him. He gave three such awards out. One of them was to his father. Alan was quite shocked and emotional to be receiving one.



This is right after he pinned the parents pins on.



And this is the family plus my cousin Quinn and his son Christian who came to support Josh. Quinn loves to tease my kids as is evident in the second photo! Thanks for coming to be with our family for the evening!

Winning the Lottery!

Lottery you say? Yes the Educational lottery! Josh got word today that he has been accepted to BYU in Provo, Utah. Now to top that news we just need to hear that the Track and Field Coach wants him to join the team up there! :) However, in light of receiving this news, my heart is tugged in another direction as I realize he will have to live in Provo to attend school there. Which means he has to LEAVE me behind! Not only that, Tessa is looking into moving in with one of her teammates. So there is quite the possibility that I will have two children moving out within 6 months. :( That is cutting our family down by a third and cutting the amount of children in half! AAAGGGHHH! I am going to have to stew over this for awhile. I am not sure I am liking this situation which is strange for me.

I have always celebrated the new experiences my children are going to have i.e.. kindergarten, first day of school every year, junior high, etc. But this graduating and leaving my home has got me mourning the whole situation. What am I going to do without their humor and their hugs? And the many other things they do that make up my life as a mother? I will always have in the back of my mind that there is someone missing! and Two someones! I guess letting them go is the whole reason you teach them to tie their own shoes and make their beds. To iron their shirts and do their own laundry. I just can't help but thinking, have I taught them enough to DO on their own what they will have to DO to DO IT! The time for teaching is nearly over and the days of keeping my mouth shut as they make their own decisions about their lives is about to begin. I pray I have done ENOUGH teaching for them to DO IT!

Marvel Morp

Josh was asked to go to MORP. The theme was Marvel MORP. Dressing up as a Marvel comic was the objective. Some of the kids next door just put on matching tee-shirts with Superman, Batman, or Captain Marvel logos on them. Josh wanted to do something even better than that. Josh can grow facial hair at quite a rapid rate. So he decided to grow out his wiskers and hair and become Wolverine! Here is what he looked like.




This one is my favorite! I put it on facebook and one of the comments from my nephew was "Hugh Jackman, is that you?" I love the way this photo turned out. After taking this photo we colored his "chops" with some black spray and you can see them in the next photo.



This is his date Courtney. She went as storm. My flash takes away the intensity of her eyes. I wish you could have seen them yourself.



I am amazed at what creative children I have. And pretty daring at that. I am sure he would have gotten the most look alike award had they given any out.

Today after church, Josh asked if I would give him a hair cut and buzz his "chops" off. He looks so much cleaner without all that red hair on his face. :)

Sushi

Okay, I know I am a little strange. Call me sheltered or underprivileged or something, but I had never had Sushi until I met Alan and not until we had been married 10 years! Now 20 years into this marriage, I can honestly say that I finally will go with him and have Sushi. It really is an acquired taste. it has taken me awhile to like it and now there are some days I crave it. So...why is it that there are some things in your life that take you so long to "get it" or "like it". What are some of the things that you have grown to like? Or something that you have been introduced to that now you love?

New Year Family Fun!

Yesterday (January 4 2012) Alan decided that we needed to get out of the house and do something together instead of sitting around all day or going to a movie. He suggested a family hike! Tessa wasn't feeling very well so she stayed home. But the rest of us got into the car and took off to Usery Pass to hike up the Wind Caves trail. Josh decided to run up them. It is about a mile up and it was breezy up at the top. It is a gorgeous view. I highly recommend it. I was glad we went.

Christmas Decorations

There is something about decorating my house for Christmas that brings the holiday cheer. I love the lights and the garlands and the ornaments (as you have seen in a previous post). I remember staring at the lights on our tree when i was a little girl. They were colored and I use to sit in the dark and watch them on the tree and their reflection in the glass windows we had in the room. You could say I was fascinated. I still am. There is something special about the lights. I also love the smells at Christmas time. The pine smell from a newly cut tree or wreath, and the cinnamons and the berries. And the music singing reminders of home and family. And it doesn't hurt to hear those yummy voices we all love to hear singing those favorite songs either.



I love the little reminders around the house that bring to me the spirit of Christmas. I have over 15 little standing Nativities that I put up in different locations through the house and I have a complete tree dedicated to anything important to the Christ Child's birth. Baby, Mother, Father, Wise men, Shepards, and the star. I even have special lights that I place on the Nativity tree. They are called "Rice Lights" Very small and they do all sorts of different lighting variations. They stay on, or twinkle, or fade in and out, and several other lighting tricks. I love to sit and watch them fade gently in an out. I can sit for a very long time just looking and thinking, especially if the house is quiet.



It is a little crazy to get it all out and put it up, but I love the way it looks when I am all done. Christmas is my favorite time of year!

My Dad

(Not great quality on this photo but it shows the complete joy he had. It was taken just a little over a week before he died.)

I lost my Father on Thursday November 17, 2011. It has only been ten years and a couple of weeks since I lost my Mother. Both we knew were dying although Dad's passing was a little more of a surprise to us than Mom's. I wish I could be a fly on the wall as they embraced on the other side. Oh what reunions there must have been. My Uncle (Dad's just younger brother) died just over two months ago which left my father as the only brother left. I am thinking that my Dad got lonely for his brothers. Either that or they had a project to do that my Dad's abilities were need for.

I have seen such tender mercies to me because of the loss of my father. My family had planned to make the trip to Utah for Thanksgiving to spend time with him. As it is, he died a couple of days before that, but we will still be in Utah for Thanksgiving. So in a way, Dad is still getting us all together. I decided to come to Utah the day I found out about his death. I bought me a one way ticket and because my computer doesn't connect to the printer, I asked Alan to print it off for me. Before he did so, he typed in his frequent flier number and it bumped me up to first class. I was able to get through security faster and off the plane quickly.

Another tender mercy is that I left in such a hurry from my home, and the shock of his death, that I hadn't thought that I would need photos for my Dad's viewing. I left them all behind. However, they were not all on my computer at home, I would have to go searching through negatives to find some of them because they were taken before I had my digital camera. I was devastated. I had to put it out of my mind because I just knew that I would fuss over it and make myself sick so I dropped it and concentrated on what I could find here in Utah. I mentioned to Ken, my brother, that I wanted a few of Dad's things for the display and so we decided to go down to my Dad's farm and look around. In a box of my Father's things were a stack of photos. The ones that I had agonized over were there in the pile, plus a few that I hadn't thought of. What a blessing!

I look forward to seeing many people that I knew as a child growing up at the viewing and the funeral. And being with my siblings has been a joy. I have the best siblings anyone could ask for. We are all supportive and kind to each other and that is such a blessing. I can't imagine going through all of this by myself. I am grateful to have them around me at times like these. I love them all so much.

Christmas Ornaments

There is something about the weather finally turning a little cooler that makes me ansy to get shopping for Christmas Ornaments. I love looking for unique and fun Christmas Ornaments more than I love shopping for gifts. I know, I know.... I am crazy! I have a few favorite places I love to go looking for that one or several ornaments that will grace my tree or the tree of someone I love. Sometimes I find the perfect ornament for someone without really looking for one for that person. Those are the ornaments I love finding the most. Now I am not going to share those favorite places I love to shop at during this holiday season, but let me put it this way... don't be surprised where you might find some of those little treasures. Tomorrow is one of those days I have set aside to go ornament hunting in North Phoenix. And I feel like a kid waiting for Christmas! Hurry and come! :)